Linus Pauling's Birthday

In addition to being National Pancake Day, today is the birthday of Linus Pauling, founding father of microbiology, Nobel prize winner and arguably the most famous graduate of OSU. Pauling is the only person to have won two individual Nobel prizes, one for chemistry in 1954 and one for peace in 1962. The Linus Pauling Institute at the university is still going strong, and the kids at Linus Pauling Middle School had a giant birthday party for him today.

As far as famous Corvallis residents go, it's nice to see a scientist at the top of the list, raking in acclaim (and being celebrated by kids in junior high, no less!), rather than a rock star.

Corvallis is...

According to Googlism, Corvallis is:

• corvallis is the classic college town
• corvallis is a haven for those who enjoy city and mountain biking
• corvallis is located in benton county in the willamette valley between the coast range and the cascades
• corvallis is in the heart of the willamette valley
• corvallis is 85 miles south of portland
• corvallis is best done by rental car
• corvallis is a small yet beautiful city in oregon
• corvallis is close to many other places
• corvallis is a wonderful place to live and visit
• corvallis is mild throughout the year
• corvallis is at a critical juncture
• corvallis is an ideal place to host meetings
• corvallis is pretty weak
• corvallis is a city rich with culture
• corvallis is a great community for alternative transportation
• corvallis is building a public skate park
• corvallis is $36 for the first person
• corvallis is a place you have to want to go to
• corvallis is rapidly becoming a regional health care center and enjoys unusually sophisticated health services for a community of its size
• corvallis is home to oregon state university and offices of several government research and natural resource agencies
• corvallis is protected from strong winds by the coast range to the west and a range of low mountains immediately to the north
• corvallis is hurting now and at enormous risk because it lacks economic diversity
• corvallis is perhaps best represented at squirrel's tavern
• corvallis is seeking a motivated individual who is energetic
• corvallis is small enough and macdonald forest is close enough to afford excellent bicycling
• corvallis is green
• corvallis is a small city with agricultural roots and is also the home of the black & orange horde aka the oregon state
• corvallis is more of a pedestrian oriented town
• corvallis is most fortunate to have mayor helen berg
• corvallis is such a place

(Okay, so it was a slow news day.)

But officer, that was years ago.

Two decades ago, Brenda Kirkelie (now Duran) apparently decided that she would rather shoot her husband than divorce him. She convinced the police that an East Indian intruder had killed her husband while robbing the store. In fact, she was apparently so convincing that one of the police officers involved with her case spent a considerable amount of time consoling the distraught widow by sleeping with her.

For 23 years, she continued living her life, marrying again and moving to Oklahoma. She probably would've escaped arrest entirely, except she angered a second husband (divorced this one instead of killing him, though) enough so that he brought in some of Ms. Duran's shotgun shells, which were exactly the same type used to kill Greg Kirkelie.

Corvallis police officers flew out to Oklahoma this past October and met with Ms. Duran for a little chat. The nature of this chat is now up for serious debate. The cops, in all their wisdom, did not bother to read Ms. Duran her Miranda rights. They claim this was an informal interview and that she was not in custody. But during this interview, Ms. Duran confessed to the murder, and it is unclear whether this will now be permitted as evidence in court. Under federal law, Miranda rights aren't invoked until there is some sort of official custody status. However, under Oregon's more stringent laws, it looks like the cops erred by not reading her the Miranda rights before they started asking questions.

However, her lawyers are much more bold than simply challenging the legality of a confession they claim was obtained under coercion and false promises. They have filed a motion asking that the case be dismissed entirely because prosecutors were "too slow" in bringing charges against their client. Say what now? There is no statute of limitations on murder charges in Oregon. That's just plain silly.

Get 'em while they're young.

Corvallis Right to Life is holding a contest for the already-born kiddies of Corvallis. The theme this year is "Life, the Best Choice." Kids from kindergarten through high school can enter the drawing contest, hopefully steering clear of the standard pro-life fare involving bloody fetus parts. Fifth graders on up can enter an essay contest. High school juniors and seniors can give an oral presentation on one of the further delineated subcategories: abortion, euthanasia, infanticide and stem cell research. There will be cash prizes, a chance to move up to the state-level contest and, of course, the chance to go to heaven, unlike those pro-choice people.

I didn't even know we had our own Right to Life chapter! According to their website, they "seek to replace a culture which glories in death with one that upholds the sanctity of human life."

I didn't even know we had a culture that gloried in death! Abortion isn't even offered here in town. Today, I guess I should just be glad this isn't South Dakota.

The truly tragic part of this is that there are constructive ways to bring down the abortion rate. Nobody actually likes abortion. Despite the rampant death-glorifying going on all around us, the folks at Planned Parenthood really don't gather around a cauldron full of discarded embryos, cackling and stoking the fire. But the same people who claim a desire to abolish abortion are all too often the same people who refuse to give children the tools they need to actually not get pregnant in the first place.

When the essay contest is being held at St. Mary's in March, maybe one of the students should discuss the radical idea that pregnancy can be prevented through the use of birth control. Maybe instead of judging the cute little posters drawn by elementary school kids who are really too young to grasp the intricacies of the life/choice debate, the pro-life folks can raise money to pay for comprehensive sex education classes that cover abstinence plus the importance of contraception as a failsafe. Maybe at the annual Oregon Right to Life rally in Salem, someone could conduct a poll to see how many of the participants support raising taxes to pay for healthcare, childcare and education so women might be able to better afford continuing pregnancies that will instead likely lead to poverty and welfare.

But of course, none of this will happen, because these people do not want anyone to have sex at all. Not really. Sex is icky and wrong, unless you're married, in which case God says it's fine, so go make some babies.

Wyden I think of that?

It might be too early in the morning for the title of this post. I should apologize, but that one wounded me as much as it will wound you, dear reader. I'm really just sharing the love.

(Actually, that lame pun is intended to honor the Sunnyside Up Cafe, which has just created a dessert with the hilarious name "You're doin' a heckuva job, Brownie." I have never eaten there, but I will absolutely be buying one of these brownies.)

Senator Ron Wyden, possibly our weirdest* Oregon Democrat, came to Corvallis last night for a town hall meeting. According to the Gazette-Times, he spent much of the meeting discussing the sale of ports to the U.A.E. and the difficulties inherent in balancing national security with civil liberties. While discussing executive powers and national security, he actually quoted Ronald Reagan, which, considering the secret sales of arms to Iran during Reagan's administration, seems a bit odd.

*Wyden is a bit of an odd bird. Very few blue-state Democrats support a flat tax, eliminating estate taxes and capital gains taxes, and think quoting Reagan is a good idea. Even fewer attempt to toe the moderate line while still having the courage to oppose the Iraq war before we invaded.

Because we said so!

Today, the City Council passed the Resolution Calling for the Withdrawal of all U.S. Troops from Iraq proposed by Leah and Bart Bolger. The language has been softened a bit from the original, now merely urging the foreign policy changes and including the requisite "Support our troops!" disclaimer, because some people still believe that taking a stance against the war is akin to personally lynching our military personnel. The city council is now directed to forward the resolution to President Bush, along with our city, county and state representatives.

And then?

Upon receipt of our city's directive, I'm confident our contrite president will have a complete change of heart. Bush, Donald Rumsfeld and Condi Rice will probably call an urgent meeting. There might even be a few tears shed. The good people of Corvallis have spoken, after all. If they want to bring home our men and women in uniform, then by Gawd, maybe we should.

Realistically, all this resolution does is provide the petitioners with a feeling of accomplishment. "We did something to stop the war," they can crow to their friends. "We took action!" Action that will sadly not be a blip on the national radar. Thinking globally and acting locally is a fantastic philosophy, unless it never accomplishes anything concrete. Rather than drafting a city resolution in a town with a population equalling roughly a third of the number of soldiers we actually have serving in Iraq right now, why not start drumming up support for like-minded politicians who represent our interests at the federal level? Why not barrage Congress with letter campaigns, and donate heavily to anti-war causes? Why not submit editorials to national press?

Full text of the resolution (PDF)

I didn't win the Powerball jackpot... who can I sue?

Last May, the boys of Sigma Chi decided to build their own equivalent of a kiddie pool on the front lawn of their fraternity. They then proceeded to drink, as frat boys are wont to do. Eventually, an inebriated Kevin Manning decided that he was properly immortal and that diving head-first into two feet of water from a platform in a tree was a good idea. He was immediately paralyzed from the neck down. He was 20 years old at the time.

Now, nearly a year later, the Gazette-Times reports that Manning has filed a lawsuit. He is suing the fraternity, Oregon State University, and the City of Corvallis for a grand total of $50 million.

I might be able to buy the argument against the fraternity. They had a party where minors were obviously able to obtain alcohol. They constructed the makeshift pool knowing that people would be drinking heavily, because that seems to be what happens at frat parties. However, Manning says that the university is negligent because they granted the party permit to the fraternity in the first place, and then makes the more bizarre claim that Corvallis itself is somehow at fault for his unfortunate injury because they allowed the fraternity to fill the pool with a city water source. The fraternity asked permission to use a fire hydrant to fill the pool and permission was granted, a fairly routine practice here in town. Does this mean that my family can sue Corvallis for wrongful death if I fill my bathtub, pop a bunch of sedatives and drown myself?

I feel for Kevin Manning. His life was shattered before he really had a chance to live it properly, but as much as he would like to angrily blame the world for his misfortune, it seems pretty clear that the blame falls a little closer to home. His attorneys admit that he was drinking, but say that "he was not drunk" when the incident occurred. Except that he clearly was. A quick glance at the police report shows that his blood alcohol level was still 0.22 by the time he had been stabilized and tested at the hospital. If he had been driving, he would have been arrested. If he had injured himself by wrecking his car with a blood alcohol level that high, his insurance company wouldn't even pay his hospital bills, because he would have been considered negligent. How is this different?

Contrast this with the front page story of the Oregonian today, about a little boy named Jordan Clarke, who was born at Oregon Health Sciences University and whose breathing tube was accidentally disconnected after open heart surgery, leaving him blind, brain-damaged and quadriplegic. Because of the Oregon Tort Claims Act, a law that caps damages in lawsuits involving state agencies, Clarke and his family can't receive more than $200,000 from OHSU, even though the hospital admits fault in this case. His medical expenses have already dwarfed that amount, and are expected to reach about $11 million in his lifetime.

There are situations where lawsuits make sense. But nobody pushed Kevin Manning, nobody coerced him into jumping, nobody plied him with booze and then helped him onto the platform. He made a bad choice. It would be great if he would channel his energy into speaking at fraternities and college campuses about the idiocy of binge-drinking and how easy it is to ruin your life in a split second. But he doesn't automatically deserve a multimillion dollar award because he made a horrible, regrettable mistake.

Time to fatten up the natives and get 'em drunk, too!

'Tis officially the season for all things sweet and tasty.

Girl Scouts have magically appeared outside many stores this past week, plying their wares liked seasoned hucksters, but they are mere harbingers of tonight's ArtCentric benefit at CH2M Hill's Alumni Center -- Chocolate Fantasy and Art Auction. From 7 to 10:30 p.m., you could be munching on creations by New Morning Bakery, Burst's Candies, Le Patissier and Kekau Chocolate. Plus, they serve wine and you can wander around bidding on the work of local artists. There is still time to pick up advance tickets and save yourself $15 off the $50 door price.

Next weekend, tummies still recovering from the chocolate orgy, you can drive the hour over to Newport for the annual Seafood and Wine Festival. Leave the kids at home, as you have to be 21 to get in. However, please be aware that just up the road, at Chinook Winds Casino in Lincoln City, Foreigner is performing on both February 24th and 25th. Don't indulge to the point of thinking that seeing them in person is a good idea.

Then, on March 4th, what might just be my favorite foodie event of the year, except that it's more of a wino event: Rhapsody in the Vineyard. For $5, you get a wine glass and ID bracelet and you can wander downtown, from store to store, drinking wines from various vineyards. (To whomever came up with this idea, I love you. Call me.) Last year, after the Inkwell store ran out of the official souvenir wine glasses, they started handing out their crystal. I ended that night drinking a glass of pinot noir in Robnett's Hardware store, giggling about police tape and power tools.

A little slice of white trash livin'

Taken from the Crime Watch section of the Gazette-Times today:

A 33-year-old Corvallis man reported his live-in girlfriend trashed his apartment because he decided to play soccer on Valentine’s Day instead of spending the evening with her. A report said the 29-year-old woman wrote on the walls, smashed beer bottles against the floor and ceiling and dumped a cat litter box “all over his bed.”

Sometimes, it's my favorite section of the newspaper. There are some real gems in there, amidst the DUI reports and meth busts and car break-ins.

As for George and Martha, well, we here at the Corvallist wish them a swift reconciliation. After all, NASCAR season is a-comin'.

Shape the future of Corvallis from the comfort of your home

If you haven't already done so, please take a few minutes to fill out the Economic Vitality Partnership survey. Rather than the traditional method of waiting for developers to submit plans, debating the plans before the City Council and eventually voting on piecemeal development referenda, this is a unique partnership between business and members of the community to develop a strategic plan for development in Corvallis that might actually satisfy everyone. However, for this to work, you need to make your views known.

There will be a community meeting tonight (Feb. 15th) at 7 p.m. at Fire Station 5, 4950 Fair Oaks Drive, off of NW Walnut Blvd. You can download the flyer [PDF] from the City of Corvallis website.

If you want to support sustainable development issues and help brainstorm ways to grow the local economy while preserving our way of life, this is a great opportunity. At the very least, fill out the survey and make your wishes known.

Valentine's Day in Corvallis

While men all over town start lining up in the Safeway express lane to buy last-minute bargain roses or boxes of candy, while women dig lingerie out of drawers, and while kids hand out perforated squares with pictures of Hello Kitty and Speed Racer, two groups on campus will instead be arguing over how to best observe the holiday.

One group of "Vagina Warriors" will be celebrating V-Day, a "global movement to stop violence against women and girls." They will be performing Eve Ensler's Vagina Monologues tonight at LaSells Stewart Center and donating "most" of the proceeds to CARDV, the Center Against Rape and Domestic Violence.

The other group will be basically criticizing the first group for being a bunch of vulgar man-haters. Sponsored by the Claire Booth Luce Policy Institute, the V-Day Unveiled campaign seeks to provide alternatives to the V-Day activities. Why? "Because men aren't monsters and real women look up."

Meanwhile, some people, apparently blinded by the fabricated Hallmark goodness that has been associated with Valentine's Day for decades, are ignoring the fuss on campus and sending singing barbershop quartet telegrams to their loved ones. Don't they know about the culture war across town? Don't they understand that Valentine's Day is about anger?

Corvallis resident running for President

I received a comment from Michael Smith, a regular Joe who has decided to campaign as a moderate Republican candidate for the 2008 presidential election. I have requested an interview with Mr. Smith and hope to print that interview here in the near future.

For now, while it is far too early to provide an actual endorsement for the 2008 election, I will give Mr. Smith a mild plug, just in the interest of local political good will. You can read more about his campaign at Michael Smith for U.S. President. While many of us eagerly gripe about the state of politics, this guy is actually doing something, even if the campaign never fully gets off the ground.

Corvallis crack whores losing part of their local heritage

Downtown Corvallis is a thriving retail district, full of wonderful little shops and upscale boutiques. The few restaurants in town where dressing up is actually required (okay, suggested...it's still the Pacific Northwest) are there, along with our stellar independent cinema.

Then we have the other major retail region in town, NW 9th Street. Unlike the downtown region, 9th Street is chock full of faded facades and fast food joints. Improvements and upgrades are sometimes attempted, such as the revised Cannery Mall, which still remains mostly empty five years after Borders moved in, but mostly, the businesses that do well are the 50-year-old plumbing supply stores and used car lots.

Another such improvement will soon be made, when the Jason Inn is torn down. The Jason Inn is one of those rare motels that still advertises waterbeds in some rooms, for the low price of $36 per night. The TV sets still have actual knobs that have to be turned and if you are lucky enough to get a bathroom where the tiles aren't broken, you're still going to get a screaming case of athlete's foot. The decor screams 1975, with disco-themed polyester bed spreads and gold shag carpeting. The on-site restaurant changes ownership on a monthly basis, but the bar has usually done a brisk business, if you like that meat market sort of atmosphere.

The place has been sort of an in joke for many local residents, who have long steered frugal visitors from out of town toward the Econo Lodge or Motel 6, where at least you could be sure that the towels had been washed since they were last used. With the Jason Inn going the way of the C.E.W. Motel, which was torn down a decade ago, Magic Fingers and all, the high school kids saving up for that special afternoon and the meth-addled party crowd will have to turn to the two remaining under-$40 motels in Southtown where you still don't need valid ID or a credit card to rent a room.

I don't think anyone will really miss the Jason Inn, but they could've torn it down to build something that might really bring retail dollars to the area. When the C.E.W. was demolished, it was replaced by Bed, Bath and Beyond, DVD World and Starbucks. This time, we're just getting a Carl's Jr.

Slumlord getting you down?

Renting property is always unpredictable, but seems to be worse in college towns, where the transient nature of most tenants can bring out the worst in some property owners. Why bother fixing a plumbing leak or improving ventilation to ward off mold, when most students will simply move out of town in a couple years anyway? (To be fair, students don't always make the best tenants either, but that's another issue.)

Andrew Quinn of the Daily Barometer wrote an excellent article listing some resources for renters faced with evil landlords. In addition, the city's Rental Housing Code (PDF) is available on the website for the City of Corvallis Housing Division.

Renting is still a crapshoot, but at least renters shouldn't have to burn furniture to keep warm in the winter, or line their living rooms with plastic tarps due to roofing leaks that are never repaired. In Corvallis, it also seems to (mostly) hold true that you get what you pay for, i.e., if you rent a two-bedroom townhouse for $350, don't act so surprised when you find discarded syringes on the front lawn. There are some exceptions to this rule, of course. Pinion Property Management charges absurd prices for properties that seem barely inhabitable, but they also seem to end up with tenants who cause ridiculous amounts of damage.

(For all you landlords who are stuck dealing with lousy tenants, you have my sympathy, but life is still easier as the property owner. The law is on your side, so go evict someone if it makes you happy.)

Fewer points for pedestrians in crosswalks

According to an article in the Daily Barometer, Corvallis police are set to begin more strictly enforcing a law requiring motorists to stop at crosswalks if pedestrians are waiting to cross. The law previously stated that drivers were supposed to stop and remain stopped until the pedestrian had finished crossing the street; however, now the rules are not quite as strict.

If you see someone waiting at the crosswalk, the law requires you to stop and allow them to cross. You must remain stopped until they are through your lane of traffic and the adjacent lane. After that, you are permitted to continue driving. Basically, this modification only applies to the larger streets in town. If there are only two lanes of traffic, stay put.

Since we all know the Corvallis police don't have much to do, other than stop cars for DUI checks and somehow not catch the plethora of bicycle thieves in town, they will actually start hanging around crosswalks waiting for people to violate this ordinance. The fine is steep -- $242 per violation. That negates any inherent fun in mowing down the pedestrian for points.

PEARL in the Rough?

Corvallis residents Irma Delson and Pat Canan have organized something called the PEARL Project -- People Energizing a Republican Left. The two former Democrats switched their voter registration to Republican last year, and have been holding house parties encouraging other Democrats to do the same. Delson and Canan apparently want to steer the Republican party more toward the middle, shoring up moderate candidates, in an effort to bridge the partisan chasm and foster a sense of collaboration and cooperation. I don't buy it.

The GOP has moved farther and farther to the extreme right since President Bush took office, to the dismay of many moderate Republicans. However, the answer to retrieving control of our country from the extremists and neo-cons is certainly not to pad the roster of the Republican party with secret liberals in an attempt to wrest control.

After all, we already have a Republican Left -- the current Democratic party.

The Democrats have compromised so much over the past decade that they have replaced the more moderate Republican party. Democrats now speak out in support of the Iraq war, in favor of capital punishment, against higher taxes. They agree that we should all be fearful of imminent terrorist attacks in small town America and that we don't really need all those pesky civil liberties after all.

The answer to taking government back from the neo-cons is to provide real alternatives, not to pick and choose which Republicans "aren't that bad." Delson and Canan, as former OSU professors, are both part of the loathed intellectual liberal elite. I suspect their true motives are to sway the primary votes away from the Republicans they don't like and toward the ones who can't win.

Maybe it's a bit early for political endorsements...

But ladies and gentlemen, I have been inspired.

Jim Feldkamp would like very much to represent Oregon's 4th Congressional District in Washington D.C. For the second time, he will be challenging incumbent Rep. Peter DeFazio this November. I will freely admit that I am already biased. I think DeFazio has done a swell job of representing Oregon and I will continue to support him as long as he continues to run. He is one of the few reasons I haven't supported term limits thus far. The man is obviously vested in what is best for Oregon and has shown some real integrity by turning down ridiculous congressional pay raises and using the superfluous salary to fund Oregon scholarships.

Just for fun, take a look at the respective "Issues" pages on the websites for both Feldkamp and DeFazio. DeFazio lists an entire page full of his stances on various issues from affordable prescription drugs to trade policies to forestry and environmental issues and so on. Feldkamp lists only three issues: jobs (good), homeland security (good) and taxes (BAD).

But I digress. My inspiration comes in the form of an article in the Gazette-Times this morning regarding Feldkamp's discussion with a group called the Linn County Republican Women. While discussing the need for American troops to "stay the course" in Afghanistan and Iraq (what a good little lapdog, repeating one of Bush's favorite phrases), he uttered this gem:

“In Vietnam, we showed that our word’s no good. Cut and run is a bad policy, bad for our allies. China and Russia will fill the void, and we don’t want that.”

So. Not only was our problem in Vietnam that we actually left the country, but Mr. Feldkamp is still afraid of the Commies. While that sort of archaic fear-mongering might still fly in the nether regions of the 4th District, I have faith that the good people of Corvallis and Benton County will help re-elect Rep. DeFazio.

Guess she isn't Wirth much...

The Gazette-Times reported today that Kelly Wirth filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy protection back in October, asking that the courts discharge $44,000 worth of debt, from a claimed total of $95,000 debt. She claims less than $6000 in assets. How does someone rack up that kind of debt without owning a home? Or is she not counting her home as an asset?

It's surprising to see the article in today's paper, as it is old news. The real Kelly Wirth news today is that Lisa Temple, the woman who mowed Ms. Wirth down with her car, pled guilty and will serve 70 months in prison. Ms. Temple read a personal statement at her sentencing that is rather hilarious.

Excerpts include:

Kelley Wirth is a victim, but also a self-involving predator that preys on vulnerable families struggling through adversity, and that family was mine.

I did act recklessly on Sept. 6, 2005 and did cause Ms. Wirth a great deal of physical pain and injury but the injuries I caused are only skin deep and will heal in time. The harm she has inflicted upon my life runs deep amd has torn through my heart and soul, stripping me of my innocence and time as well.

She does end the statement with an apology and an offer to pray for Kelly Wirth. I say the two ladies really deserve each other.

In the Willamette Valley, Groundhog's Day is pointless.

Whatever happens with the groundhog's shadow, around here, our forecast is for rain.

It rained 13.95 inches in January -- shy of the all-time record of 15 inches in January 1970. While we missed that record, we did break the record for the wettest 31 days on record with the period ending January 19th. Woohoo! Go team!