Vagina.

There, I said it, right out in the open. Why? A couple of good reasons, actually.

First of all, Eve Ensler's Vagina Monologues (PDF) are coming back to Corvallis. The show will be performed at LaSells Stewart Center on February 22nd and 23rd and will cost you a mere $10, the majority of which will go to the Center Against Rape and Domestic Violence. A most worthy cause.

The Vagina Monologues are supposed to be empowering and demystifying, which is why it is utterly bizarre that the name of the play was actually changed to the "Hoohah Monologues" in Atlantic Beach, Florida. One of my favorite authors, Neil Gaiman, explains that the play was renamed "to avoid offended passers-by with small daughters who ask embarrassing questions...which seems, somehow, to miss the point on a scale that is positively awesome." That, dear readers, is why the title of this post proudly stands as is.

Also, there will be a Pap-A-Thon that Saturday, February 24th, from 9 a.m. to noon. If you are uninsured or underinsured, you can take advantage of Samaritan OB/GYN's free cervical cancer screening. Not only can you assume the stirrup position without a copay of any kind, but they will offer chair massages, child care and refreshments. (Not while you're on the table, probably.) That's the first time a Pap smear has sounded festive!

While some recommendations have been changed to suggest that women only need Pap smears every three years, for many women, this is their only contact with a doctor, so if you haven't been in a while, please go. To participate, call 768-5220 to make an appointment. Walk-ins are also welcome.